Ten

Ten Things I Want to Accomplish Before I Graduate:

1. Watch all episodes of Faces of Death back to back, lights off, heat on full blast, and holding a knife or some sort of hatchet. Naked, of course.
2. Cleanse my brain of morbid thoughts. Bleach up the nose should do the trick.
3. Dance on a tabletop. Any tabletop. Batman outfit and nothing else (of course).
4. Blow midwestern fairwell kisses to Tyson from afar. Was he there when Liz got nekkid at my wedding?
5. Find out if Tyson was there...
6. If so, pump bleach up his nose.
7. From afar.
8. Bake like fifty fucking cakes and eat em all in record time
9. Tell off all of my enemies
10. Steve, you son of a bitch, where were you when I was being beaten to a bloody pulp by those biopsych gangsters? I was dying, Steve, and you hardly batted an eye. I'll KILL you. ----------------One down, thirty-two to go.